Jul 24

Summer vignette…

Photo 218So I just got back from a place called “Splash” in Denver. It’s filled with waterslides, sprinklers, an overly large sandbox, water slides, and a humongous bucket that dumps on everyone every ten minutes. There are kids running everywhere, some running to parents, and others, of course, running from parents.

It’s hot chlorinated chaos. The kind that can make someone rub their temples and contemplate why in the world they paid fifteen dollars per person to be constantly splashed in the face by someone’s precious little darling.

And then the perfect chaos stops…cold. Whistles tweet and kids and adults dash from the water like a shark has been spotted in the 4ft section.

The water settles, calm, serene.

All accept for the poop floating on top of the water.

Yes, someone pooped in the pool. It happens, I guess, though this was my first experience with something of this magnitude.

Moms and dads check themselves and their young for any sign of tainted brown water on their skin (or in their pants). 

Brave high school lifeguards enter the deficated pool with blue gloves as innocent (or maybe not so innocent) onlookers stand by the water watching the poop patrol do their dirty duty. People scan the crowd for the culpret, but he or she has already fled the scene. Probably watching from a distance, laughing to avoid any detection, or perhaps eating a bag of cotton candy at a picnic table. And really, the pooper would be foolish to admit the crime.

Once the water was flushed with chemicals, chaos was restored, and the lifeguards exited the pool as hereos.

And though I hope, as I’m sure we all do, to be a hero sometime in our lives to someone…I have to say I’ll pass on this one.

If that was me who had to wade through the chlorinated water searching for the renegade feces, I’d turn in my pretty red shorts, the silver shiny whistle, and the red saftey device.

I think I’ll stick to writing about poop instead of siphoning it out of a pool…and maybe I’ll make someone chuckle or giggle for just a moment.

Yep, I’ll be that kind of hero.

One Response to “Summer vignette…”

  • Melanie says:

    Wow. I’m hoping that’s one experience I’ll never have to have. I’m definitely with you. I would much rather quit than have to do that. And yes, I do currently have a pretty big smile on my face. :)

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